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Bill's
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The Mac fanatic's thoughts
on the outside world
what's
this blog thing all about, anyway?
3:55 am, Sunday, 6/13: the end is the beginning
Dang it, I've hit one of those moments where I can't manage to write anything again. Good thing it's a weekend, I suppose. I'll wake up tomorrow and be fine, perhaps even bursting with new articles, but today I've got nothing. And at this point, I've learned not to try to force it.
It's not as if I'm unable to write at all. I mean, I seem to have no problem coming here and writing about the fact that I can't seem to write. And it's not as if I've run out of relevant topics. I've got plenty of those, but I'm seemingly unable to wrap enough cohesive words around any of them to the point that I end up with something of merit. Oh well. At least it didn't happen on a weekday.
LoadPod. What to say about LoadPod? Will it be a success, or just a big waste of time? I don't know. But then again, when I started this site, I had no idea whether it would fly, either. And when I decided to try and make a living from the site, I didn't know if that was going to work. Same thing with when I started iPod Garage and MacUsingEducators. And so it goes with LoadPod. In a matter of two weeks, I've managed to build a network of reps that covers twenty-five States. If I still worked in a school, I could probably tell you that that's something like half the country. ;)
So we'll see.
I haven't been home in a week. That's kind of strange, considering that I've only been living there about two weeks so far. I needed to send my new address to an advertiser last night, and I honestly couldn't remember what it was. Not certain parts of it, but any of it. Not even the town. Think I'm confused enough about where I'm living and what I'm doing?
The issue, of course, is that on a local level, my life just isn't balanced. I've just spent seven months living in a town that I knew would mean nothing to me, and now I'm living a town that might someday mean something to me, but not quite yet. Through my websites and my little business ventures, I'm beginning to figure out where I belong on a world-view level, but I still know nothing about where I belong on a local level. I still read the newspapers from down in South Florida, but almost never the local ones from up here. It just feels like I'm reading about someone else's life, not mine. Like I grabbed a newspaper while I was on vacation, just to catch a glimpse into what life is like somewhere else. Except, of course, that it's been a seven-month working vacation.
I follow every move of the sports teams from down south, and despite trying to get interested,, I still could care less about the local ones around here. The local NHL hockey team around here just won the Stanley Cup, and how much did I care? So much so that until I heard the news, I didn't even recall that Central Florida had an NHL hockey team.
And maybe this is the way that it's supposed to be. Maybe even the way that it'll always be. I don't know. Is this what life is about, moving around from place to place with which you're not familiar, starting over each time? I suppose that most people have their relocations dictated by their career. If you like your job, you stay where you are, because moving would require finding a new job. If you have your heart set on a new job, and it's located somewhere else, then you relocate so that you can take the new job.
But this line of work that I've found, I can literally live anywhere. Pick a point on a map, and I could move there tomorrow if I really wanted. All I'd need is my laptop and an internet connection. And that's great, right? But it presents me with many more choices than I'd really expected to have. Sometimes, it's almost easier if some aspects of your life are already dictated to you, because then at least you can focus in on those aspects that you have control over. Unlimited choices is just a wacky thing. Because, you see, having choices doesn't mean having it all. You still have to pick what you want, and not have the rest. If you've only got room in your stomach for one scoop of ice cream, then it doesn't matter whether you've got a choice of two flavors of two hundred, you still only get to choose one.
So I'll stay here for awhile, and then after that, I don't know. And I think maybe that's the way it's supposed to be. Unsurety is not my thing. I like knowing my options. I like having a fallback. I like having unlimited upside and no downside. But then, don't we all? I guess there's no such thing as risk-free living, though. Sometimes you've just got to line up your options and make your choices. And live with them. And own them.
So that's the lesson for today, kids. Once you make your choice, own it. And uncertainty isn't the end of the world. In fact, sometimes, it's the beginning.
School's out, Bill. Enjoy your summer.
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11:23 pm, Tuesday, 5/25: home and home again
The eternal kicker about doing a personal blog such as this one, is that the more that's going on in your life, the more you have that you want to write about...and the less time you have to write it. And the big irony, for me at least, is that I spend all day writing for websites, but when I want to relax, what do I do? I come here to the Blog so that I can do even more writing. But after spending all day being limited to certain predetermined topics on my professional sites, there's a certain catharsis to coming here and being able to write about just about anything. That having been said, it's been a busy, busy month. And if anything, this month is going to get even busier before it finally comes to a close.
Right now I'm sitting at a restaurant / sports bar called Crabby Jack's (yes, right now, as I type -- welcome to the power of a laptop, baby), and when I'm tempted to step back and take in the absurdity of it all, I just can't allow myself; there's simply no time to do so. This is work? This a job? This is a career? Yeah. You wanna win a bet? Go back in time eight months ago, and offer me million-to-one odds that I'd be doing this right now.
Everything has changed. Everything.
And yet, I'm currently sitting no more than a few hundred yards from the house I grew up in, which just happens to be located back behind the shopping center whose parking lot contains this particular eating establishment. But while I'm so close to "home" in a literal sense, in reality I couldn't be much further away from it. This isn't home. Not anymore. Now I understand what it is to be from a certain place, and have nothing but fond memories of it, and love visiting it, and yet have no desire to move back there.
Ironically, now is the precise time that I could have done exactly that. The lease was up at the end of this month; I had to move somewhere new one way or the other; I could have moved back to the hometown (or just about anywhere else, for that matter) if I'd wanted to. But instead, I chose to stay in the same area that I've been living in for the past seven months. The only adjustment I made was the choice to bail out on the tourist-overload town I was living in, and head to the neighboring town, which has, you know, actual permanent residents. In other words, if you meet someone, the odds are strong that you might actually see them again, as opposed to meeting nothing but tourists who will be gone in four days anyway.
Eternal credit goes to this restaurant for playing the original version of "Behind Blue Eyes" by The Who, as opposed to the pitiful recent cover version by Limp Bizkit. And I can now tell you, without hesitation, that my next computer-related investment will be a second battery for my laptop. Yeah, you know what that means. Between the user group meeting and now two additional hours of typing away while eating dinner, this battery's just about toast. That's fine, as dinner's just about done, and I don't really know how many more free soda refills I can ask for, before they finally decide they want their table back so that they can give it to someone who's actually ordering items that cost something.
I feel like I need to wrap up this entry with a profound parting thought (and I can't think of any), but then again, it's my blog and I can do what I want to. So I'll just call it a day, and (if I can hunt down some internet access) I'll post this entry to the site in the morning. Late morning.
The waitress just brought me a whole pitcher of soda. How's that for profound?
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11:39 am, Friday, 5/7: Writing Mac and writing smack
It was a mere afterthought. I was already done writing for the day. But I just couldn't get my experience at dinner last night out of my head, and it really did make me think about a few experiences at Apple Stores, so I went ahead and told the story. Or rather, the stories. The old compare and contrast thing. The ridiculous yet humorous experience of a bumbling fast food crew vs. the serious yet excellent experience of the lights going out in lower Manhattan. You interweave the stories in such a way that if you've done it right, the reader can see the extent of the contrast without you having to work too hard to explicitly point it out.
There wasn't much of a point to the story. But as soon as I'd written it, I'd recognized it as one of my better pieces of writing, which struck me as ironic. But then I thought about it, and maybe it's that way for a reason. You see, if you have a point to make, then your primary goal is to make your point -- not to tell a story. But if you have no real point to make, and you're just sharing stories about Chick-Fil-A drink lids and trips to New York, then you can actually focus on storytelling. Which, as it turns out, is kind of fun.
Most, nearly all in fact, of my writing is at least tangentially related to Apple, the Mac, the iPod, education, or some other topic upon which I have a point to make. But I knew that the silly little article I'd written was going to get picked up by other sites, despite the fact that it really, truly didn't have a point. Mac related? Not really. Apple related? Just barely. It was mostly about how they gave my food to some other guy, and how they couldn't find the right size lid for my drink. But sure enough, within two hours of publication, it was already the feature story on MacDevCenter, the site maintained by O'Reilly, the book publisher. They feature a grand total of one article per day, and this was the one they chose. Somehow I saw that coming.
You know, I don't think that this here story has any point, either. But then, I guess that's the whole point.
Maybe I should write a novel. Fiction for that matter.
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2:56
pm, Wednesday, 4/7: Chocolate chip ice cream: do they still make
it?
Very
rarely do I decide that I want ice cream, but today was one of those
days. And for reasons unknown to me, it simply had to be chocolate
chip. There are times when I'm open to a variety of flavors, and
I have particular no objection to the new-fangled flavors that consist
of randomly mixing together about seven existing flavors along with
three edible objects that have no prior connection to ice cream whatsoever.
But I've got to ask you this: when did they stop making chocolate
chip ice cream?
You
see, I went down to the corner to the CVS, and I should explain up
front that I try to avoid buying anything at one of these pharmacy-type
stores whenever I can. In fact, with the often absurd pricing premiums
that these types of stores employ, there are only two circumstances
in which you should ever find yourself shopping at one. The first
is if it's last night or early morning, and no grocery stores are
open. The second is if you're only buying one item, and thus the
jacked up pricing doesn't add up to enough to do any real damage
to you, because it's, you know, only one item.
So
I entered CVS based on the second principle outlined above, and proceeded
to the ice cream freezer, where I found five different brands of
ice cream featuring about twenty-five different flavors. Several
of which I'd never heard of. And I try to keep up on these things,
I'll have you know. But among the two dozen-plus flavors available
in all their overpriced glory, not one of them was chocolate chip.
I gotta tell you, I was just taken aback. Now I could have accepted
this if they were simply sold out of chocolate chip, but no: there
were no empty spaces on the shelf. This store just doesn't see fit
to sell chocolate chip ice cream. Wouldn't that be like watching
an episode of the Simpsons in which Bart didn't appear? Come on,
ask anyone to name five flavors of ice cream, and once they get past
vanilla and chocolate, one of their other three answers is bound
to be chocolate chip. Which is news to them, because apparently the
flavor has been discontinued.
It
turns out I was in a mood where it was going to be chocolate chip
or nothing at all, so I left CVS and briefly flirted with the thought
of heading for a real store. But then I reminded myself that the
local WalMart keeps its registers so pitifully understaffed that
if you were to buy ice cream you'd have to bring a spoon with you
and eat it in line, because it would be fully melted by the time
you got to the register. I'm afraid I'm not exaggerating even slightly.
I hate shopping carts so when I do my weekly shopping at this store,
I simply carry all my items in my arms as I progress through the
aisles (hey, I'm a light shopper). But once I've got all my items
and it's time to get in line, I don't even chance it. I get a basket
and put my stuff in it, because getting through the line is going
to take just that long.
So
not having a spoon with me at the time, I decided that WalMart was
not a viable option. I then turned my thoughts toward Publix (a grocery
store chain, if you're not from 'round these here parts)...
...insert your own ending to this story here.
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9:32
am, Monday, 4/5: Lest ye think I'd gone and died...
I
admit,
maybe it wasn't good form to complain of being sick and then disappear
for a week. So lest ye think I died, here's what's up...in no particular
order:
1)
John Wells, if you do to The West Wing what you did to ER, I'm going
to hunt you down. Last week's West Wing episode was a throwaway,
a cheap gimmick. You gotta do better. If helicopters start falling
out of the sky and landing on the heads of West Wing characters,
I'm gonna find out where you live, I promise.
2)
Thanks to everyone who wrote in to wish me a happy birthday.
3)
I'm not making this up, this was the progression of news stories
on the local news this morning: shot of fire in Miami. shot of fire
in Jacksonville. shot of boat on fire in Brevard. I didn't know that
the local news up here was based on themes.
4)
The winner of the national table tennis championship has the last
name "Ping". There are just so many things wrong with that, I don't
know where to start. Let me try and guess what her doubles partner's
name might be...
5)
online MUG meeting tonight. be there or I hate you.
6)
New advertiser for the site, EazyDraw.
It's an aptly-named drawing program. Check it out, tell 'em I sent
ya.
7)
I wish I knew why my eyes will no longer allow me to wear contact lenses.
Oh well, it was a good ten year run.
8)
The cheapest airline has rated out as having the best customer satisfaction.
For some reason, I'm not surprised.
9)
I developed a little rash on my right wrist that prevented me from
being able to wear my wristwatch (I'm left handed). No big deal,
it's almost gone already, but I've gone crazy not being able to wear
a watch. I tried wearing it on my left wrist (for the first time
in my 27 years) and found that I could barely managed to put it on
using my right hand (proving just how severely left handed I really
am). Once I did get it on, I was okay until I tried to type, and
realized that I just couldn't do it, and had to take it off. Even
with it off, it's still difficult to type, because my right wrist
is still trying to adjust to not having a watch on it. I supposed
I'll get used to it right about the time that I can safely resume
wearing the darn thing. In the mean time, don't ask me what time
it is, or expect me to show up on time for anything.
10)
After tonight, college basketball is gone. Gone, I say! One more
game, and then the sports news outlets can resume talking about topics
that I actually care about. Actually, they'll probably spend the
next two weeks rehashing what a "wonderful, mesmerizing" championship
game it was. Let's talk about pro football already. I know
there are no games for another five months and absolutely nothing
to report about the subject, but come on, make up some stuff if you
have to.
11)
Speaking of pro football, the next guy to star in "The Bachelor"
is, for some reason, New York Giants backup quarterback Jesse Palmer.
His father's name is Bill Palmer, and I know this because I've been
contacted to find out whether it's me. If I'm Jesse Palmer's father
then that's remarkable, because he's a year older than me. But the
kicker is that Jesse just happens to have a brother who plays college
football, who will make it to the pros in another year or two. His
name? Billy Palmer Jr. Yeah, I just can't wait for that
to happen. I already get enough crap about having the same name as
the founder of Applebee's restaurant. Oh, and then there's that little
thing about having the same name as my own father.
12)
Speaking of people named Bill Palmer, I wonder how many people each
day end up at this
guy's site, looking for me, and vice versa. Apparently, he's
a banjo playing magician. Better, I suppose, than a bungee jumping
mortician.
13)
Bungee jumping mortician? Good Lord, my mind is wandering to some
strange places these days.
14)
Kurt Cobain checked out ten years ago today. When I first heard the
news, I was at a hotel in Dayton, Ohio. I'll let you use your imagination
as to what I could possibly have been doing at a hotel in Dayton,
Ohio.
15)
Did I mention there's a MUG meeting tonight? ;)
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2:52
am, Monday, 3/29: The art of writing. Also, dogs.
Alright,
I'm sick. Not good. Too much to be accomplished today to be sick.
I don't know, maybe I can shake it off. Right now, I can barely stand
up. And although sitting any typing is clearly not out of the question,
writing anything of any intelligence might be a stretch. I'll see
if I can't publish something on both sites that's not too embarrassing.
I'm
afraid that this entry is a little short...
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6:27
am, Wednesday, 3/24: The art of writing. Also, dogs.
Having
received the official thumbs-up for writing about something other
than football yesterday, I think maybe I'll try it again. But on
the other hand, no promises.
The
art of writing is on my mind again. Some famous musician (I think
it might have been McCartney) said that as a music writer, the songs
that come to you voluntarily always end up being the ones that become
the best songs. And I think might be true with writing columns as
well. I've struggled for hours trying to write a certain article
that just didn't want to be written, only to suddenly catch
inspiration on some other topic, start over completely, and have
a complete article written in a matter of minutes.
But
that is kind of rare. I think the best columns are the ones that
are sort if in the back of my head for the better part of the day,
subconsciously, and then at a certain point I'll be in the store
or in the car or something, and it'll just come together in my head,
and I'll smile because I know I've got a winner. But then I'll get
mad because I'm not in front of a keyboard. By the time I get home
I'm about to explode, because the article is already completely written,
and has been completely transferred to my fingertips, and is just
waiting to form on screen. Those ones are the most fun writing, because
since the article itself has already been constructed, you can spend
your conscious effort working on the exact wordage and phrasing of
the piece, rather than worrying about what the next paragraph should
be about.
Take,
for instance, the article I wrote today about iTunes competition
on iPod Garage. That one had been in my head since yesterday, and
was actually going to be four articles until I realized that the
four topics were closely related enough that they'd do better as
one long piece. By this afternoon, not only did I have every paragraph
or the article crafted in my head, I'd actually gone so far as to
come up with some of the key phrases. I was just about to sit down
and scribe it, when I decided that I wanted to work on the source
material just a tiny bit more, so I went to WalMart and paced around
listening to my iPod for a half an hour, just so I could squeeze
a little bit more out of the old brain prior to committing the article
to actual text. The funny thing was, I didn't even need anything
from WalMart, I just needed somewhere to go. I was going to buy a
thing of potato chips, but upon realizing how ridiculously long the
lines were, I gave up and left empty-handed. No matter; I'd found
what I was looking for.
When
it came to sitting down at the computer and spitting out the article,
I isolated myself by putting on the earbuds and cranking the music.
I have no idea why I need to have such audible isolation in order
to type, but it seems to be the key part of the puzzle. Even if there's
no one home, even if there's no other noise, I need to lock myself
into just the music and nothing else. Audibly, it's got to be just
me and the computer. And this may be the strangest thing to try to
explain, but without the music, I can't hear myself think. But with
the music, it's as if all of my stray thoughts are absorbed by the
music, leaving me hear only the inner voice that's speaking the article
that I'm typing. It's a weird thing.
Because
visually, I don't care what all's going on. I actually like having
the TV on, so that there's some background imagery moving around
in the room (thus preventing the illusion that time has stopped altogether
from creeping into the equation), but I either put it on mute or
crank the music to the point that I can't hear any trace of the TV.
I don't care how many people (or dogs) are in the room or what they're
doing, so long as I don't have to hear any of the noises that they're
making. Lights on or off doesn't matter, although it's a bit difficult
to see the keyboard if there's absolutely no light (which is another
reason to have the TV turned on, it allows you to have all the lights
in the room turned off, but still have it not be pitched black.
Speaking
of dogs, the one that we'll refer to as "Roger #2" (for old time's
sake) did the silliest thing last night. He's been trying to jump
up into my lap while I'm sitting in the computer chair for as long
as he's been here, but no matter how much bigger he gets, he still
can't do it. Just to make him feel better, I'll occasionally pick
him up after a failed attempt and place him in my lap, but he never
stays for long, perhaps feeling that he didn't earn it. But last
night, he finally pulled it off, although he couldn't gain any traction
and immediately started sliding back down. I crossed my legs so that
he wouldn't slide down any farther, and he just stared up at me,
giving me this "I made it, but now I'm just sort of hanging on for
dear life" look. He started trying to claw his way back up, and finally
pulled it off. Once he was perched on my lap, he just looked around
as if to say "I can't believe I did it". And this time, he stayed
for quite awhile, apparently in celebration of his achievement, before
Roger #1 persuaded him to go running brainlessly around the apartment
again.
Nothing
if not interesting, in a minutiae sort of way. Hey, what do you know,
no football at all this time. Enjoy it while it lasts. I feel another
article coming on. Gotta go...somewhere.
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1:10
am, Tuesday, 3/23: something else entirely
Word
from the gallery is that I've been writing too much about no-name
football players lately, so I'll put it off for at least another
day. Instead, I'll turn to another subject that I love beating into
the ground, but haven't had much occasion to do so lately: the cold.
You see, it's nearly April, so this cold weather nonsense is supposed
to be gone by now, right?
No?
Hey,
what do I know? Where I come from, there are five days a year, max,
that go below 50 degrees. So yeah, the winter weather here in sunny
Central Florida might be warmer than in about 98% of the country,
but it's still killing me. I've counted at least twenty-five "cold"
days so far this winter, and I can't begin to imagine why, here in
almost-April, it's decided to get cold yet again. Walking
the dogs a couple hours ago, heck if I didn't think it was about
to start snowing.
Alright,
so I got the "cold" rant out of my system, so I should be good to
go for the rest of this particular cold snap, which really ought
to be the last one. I hope. If it's the middle of May and these cold
evenings are still happening, I'm packing up and moving to Tahiti.
Speaking
of natural occurrences, I had occasion to more or less drive right
through a forest fire today, and that's not something that I can
say I've ever done before. Being that it was rush hour, I figured
that I'd pay the exorbitant tolls and take the mercifully traffic-less
Parkway, rather than 192, which is full of lost tourists who, given
the heavy construction the road is under, really don't stand much
of a chance of driving like anything other than idiots. So anyway,
it's rush hour and I'm going to save time on the Parkway, except
that the forest on the south side of the Parkway just happens to
be on fire. The forest comes within ten feet of the road, and the
flaming trees came within ten feet of the edge of the forest, so
it was kind of weird to just be twenty feet away from a forest
fire, and just sit there and stare at it. Nothing to be done, the
fire department was already there, and considering that every car
in front of me had slowed down to approximately zero MPH in order
to get a good look, I was just kind of going with the flow by not
going anywhere.
Note
to self: Next time you want to save time by taking Osceola Parkway,
first make sure it's not on fire.
Note
to the State: The
$1.25 Parkway toll for going six miles wasn't nearly high enough.
Neither was the $1.00 Turnpike toll for going four miles. Thanks
for raising them both. Next time I'll just take the highway, and
bring along a good book.
Another
note to the State: And
this is just a thought, really, but when a road is on
fire, it
might be considered bad form, in some circles, to still charge
the toll. Like I said, just a thought.
Okay,
here's a weird one. One of my absolute favorite bands, who go by
the who's-on-first-type name of "Live", whom I've seen in concert
eight times over the years in eight different venues, have largely
lost their mainstream popularity. Through no fault of their own,
of course. It's just that the whole '90's flavor of alternative rock
popularity that propelled them to such popularity in the first place
has long since passed, leaving the band left largely with its true
fans and not much notoriety beyond that. So anyway the band puts
out a great album last year that barely gets any radio airtime at
all. No surprise. But on some whim, Live's vocalist Ed Kowalczyk
decides to go into the studio last week and re-record one of the
album's underperforming tracks as a duet with country star Shelby
Lynne (at least I think she's country?). I think he was just bored
or something.
But
somehow the duet finds its way to radio popularity, and not only
is it getting more radio airplay than anything from the album, all
the sudden "Live with Shelby Lynne" is being booked on every TV show
from Jay Leno to Ellen DeGeneres to Sharon Osbourne. And I have to
admit, it's actually a nice rendition of the song. But it's funny,
because here's this band that fell off the mainstream map so long
ago that it had no real chance of getting back on no matter how good
its current music might be, but this little gimmick duet comes along
and does the trick. Huge credit goes to Ed for insisting that the
rest of the band be onstage with him for these TV performances, despite
the fact that none of them were even involved with the recording
of the duet (it doesn't even have drum or bass guitar tracks). Rather
than using it as an excuse to try and go solo, he's trying to use
it to put the band back on the map.
Maybe
it'll work. I mean, I love the fact that I can go and see them at
the tiniest of venues and sit in like the tenth row with no one necessarily
behind me, but I'm afraid that at some point they're going to give
up altogether, so if this duet thing boosts their name recognition
enough to get them at least selling out the littler venues, then
fantastic. And if not, then I'll just see if I can get the band to
play my living room on their 2005 world tour.
See
there? I've written a good twelve paragraphs with nary a mention
of obscure football players. Oh, alright, just one: there's an article
in the newspaper in which the headline is about the Dolphins possibly
signing a tackle named Todd Perry, and the second half of the article
has its own headline, which is about the Dolphins having just signed
a long snapper named Ed Perry. So the first headline reads "Dolphins
considering signing Perry",
and then the next headline below it reads "Dolphins sign Perry".
And all I can think is, "gee whiz, they move fast!".
So
that's my football story for the day. I guess you just had to be
there...
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7:15
am, Monday, 3/22: somethin' new
There.
I did it. I posted a concert review to the iPod Garage. Other than
the obligatory link to the band's catalog in the iTunes Music store,
there's not a bit of iPod-related content in the whole piece. I've
said all along that the site would be at least as much about the
music as about the technology, and now I think I've proven that I
meant it. The technology is the "safe" topic, because there's a built-in
audience for such content coming in from MacSurfer and the other
Apple-related sites. But the music? That's a topic that just sometimes
needs to be written about. Lest we forget what an iPod is: a music player.
Anyway,
it feels like a breakthrough.
No
one's asking me to write about the music, though. Accessory companies
are asking me to write product reviews. Apple fans are always wanting
to hear more about what the iPod means to the company's present and
future. But of the current reader base, no one's asking for music
content -- meaning, of course, that it's just an opportunity to expand
the reader base. How on earth I pull in readers looking for music
content who don't otherwise know I exist, well that's something I've
got to work on. Like I said, it's easy to write up iPod-related content
and get it linked up to by MacSurfer and others, and to know that
there's an incoming audience beyond the daily loyal reader base that
comes directly to the site and at least glances over everything there,
no matter what it's about. So what's the musical equivalent of MacSurfer?
Heck if I know. But they're out there, and I've got to go find them.
For
those wondering why I felt I had to start a separate site centered
around the iPod, this is it. A review of a Fuel concert
would just make no sense at all on billpalmer.net, but on a site
that's named after a music player, it fits in with the topic well
enough that I can get away with it. Maybe Rolling Stone will find
me and like my music writing enough that they'll hire me. Or maybe
not. What do I care? I've got my own advertisers. Maybe I'll
just become Rolling Stone. Hey, why not? Never dreamed of
getting this far this fast, so why not dream bigger? I seem to have
a knack for somehow being able to make it become a reality lately.
Not knowing what I'm doing seems not to be a problem.
back
to billpalmer.net
3:15
am, Saturday, 3/20: the end is the beginning is the...
Is
it Saturday already? Oh, where did this week go. I'd write more,
but I've got a plane to catch. Hmm, a plane, you say, Bill? Where
are you traveling to? No, see I meant a new plane of existence. Fooled
ya, heh.
Alright,
it's a good thing I don't write comedy for a living.
But
seriously, I'm still trying to figure out just how it is that I've
ended up writing anything for a living. Writing was just
never my subject. I was never told that I was bad at it, I just didn't
do it much. Never more than I had to. Bottom line is that my hand
cramps up terribly when I'm gripping anything like a pen for any
amount of time, always has, and so the physical act of writing was
never enjoyable. Therefore, I never really got to figure out that
I enjoyed writing, until I found myself in front of a keyboard. And
by then, I had too much of a mental block against the idea of enjoying
writing that it took me forever and ever to figure out that I could
actually both enjoy it and excel at it. All I had to do was remove
the physical barrier, and the whole outlook changed.
Then
again, I've got the most bizarre typing style, it's no wonder typing
doesn't bother me physically. But it never has. My two index fingers
are the only two that I really have much precise control over, so
I only use the two fingers to type, but they can get around wicked-fast
on the keyboard, and as a result,I can type faster than anyone I
know, by a long shot. Which is a good thing, because I thoughts come
to me way too fast when I'm writing, and if I couldn't get it scribed
as quickly as I do, I think I'd lose a lot of it. Don't get me wrong,
I've endured typing courses (on actual typewriters, and that was
only back in 1991, so it shows just how far we've come how fast),
and I've learned how to type using all ten fingers, but when it comes
down to it, I can type about ten times faster with only two fingers.
It's
why rule followers and guideline followers never get anywhere. Rules
and guidelines were written by people who aren't you, so while they
often contain general truths and wisdom, the idea that the finer
details of what worked well for someone else are going to match up
to the finer details of your strengths, is preposterous at best.
Which is not to say you shouldn't take advice, but take it for what
it is: a roadmap of what worked and didn't work for someone else
who is not in your situation and is not you. Figuring out how it
applies or doesn't apply to your and your situation, well that's
the stuff of legends.
Okay,
that last phrase didn't make any sense, but I really just felt like
typing "the stuff of legends" at that moment. And that's the beauty
of all this. It's also what makes it so unique. Every once in awhile
I feel like I want to stop and ask what's next, which direction to
I take the franchise in next. But there's no one to ask. I'm not
following a roadmap here, I'm making my own history. I just kick
myself every day for waiting until I was 26 to do this for myself.
But
then, maybe I needed all that back there to get to all this up here.
Maybe I needed college to be a complete waste of my time, to prove
to me that what's good for most people isn't necessarily of any use
to me. Sure, knowing what I know now, I'd rather have just not gone
to college at all in the first place. But as it is now, I have an
urgency about what I'm doing, as if to try and make up for lost time.
And
I kick myself daily for the fact that once I happened upon the Macintosh
thing, I spent five years playing it way too close to the vest, staying
at the elementary school, limiting my talents and potential to such
a small sphere. And even though I'd figured out the "writing about
Macintosh" thing pretty quickly, I kept it stifled for years, simply
not willing to take chances. Yeah, I should have started my website
around 1999, and I should have bolted the elementary school by 2001.
I should have accepted the fact that I'd made a major contribution
there, and began doing things that were in my best interests. Instead,
I was more concerned about the well-being of a program I'd built,
than my own well-being. I stayed too long. When the school's administration
began nosediving into spectacular self-destruction, taking the rest
of the school with it, I had to spend far too much time protecting
my program, and far too little time building it. The minute I realized
that was the scenario, I should have bolted. But I just couldn't
do it. Call it sentimentality.
But
once I finally left and I was able to recreate things from scratch,
I was able to do so using what I'd learned the hard way along the
way. My five years of doing what was in the best interests of others,
taught me to do what's in my best interests. Five years of playing
things too close to the vest, taught me that there are obvious chances
that obviously need to be taken, and when you're able to identify
them, the risk lies primarily in not taking
them.
I
feel like I took a series of random roads while trying to get
to an unknown destination, but despite taking longer to get there
than I wanted to, I somehow managed to get where I wanted to be,
even though all along I didn't know where that was. Plus, now I know
the roads. Of course, it's only now that I've arrived that I
realize that the destination was merely a starting point. But what
a fun trip this is going to be.
And,
oh yeah, it's my birthday in two weeks. Gonna be 27. I ain't gettin'
any younger. But then again, maybe I am.
back
to billpalmer.net
2:48
pm, Thursday, 3/18: Press conference upcoming
Here's
where the Internet gets terribly fun. The Dolphins are holding a
press conference to officially introduce David Boston at 3 pm today.
Back in the days before broadband internet, the closest a fan wound
get to the press conference would be eight seconds of soundbites
that some local network affiliate chose to air, or three sentences
that the newspaper chose to give you. But these days, you just go
to the Dolphins website and listen to eh press conference, live,
in its entirety. Odd, though, that the Dolphins are only paying for
an audio broadcast, whereas Dan Marino got a video stream.
But
then again, this is only David Boston. At best, he'll make the Dolphins
passing game decent enough that it'll free up Ricky to do his thing
on running plays. But the press conference should particularly fun.
Boston will be on his absolute best behavior, because players joining
new teams always are. But the press will try desperately to get him
to light up the (many, many) people in San Diego he couldn't get
along with, because it's their job to do so. The give-and-take will
be interesting, to say the least.
Hey,
short of actual football, it's the closest thing to sports gratification
I can come by this time of year. Whoops, gotta go, press conference
is about to start. It's here, if you're really wondering...
back
to billpalmer.net
5:44
am, Tuesday, 3/16: Thank you, CNET, for the inspiration. Hello,
Boston. no, not that Boston
Thanks,
CNET. I wasn't entirely sure what to write about on iPod Garage today,
but CNET's laughably fictitious article about sales at the iTunes
Music Store made my job easy. As if no one would notice that it's
not April 28th yet. I guess when they get bored over there, they
just make up crap for the sake of bringing in angry rebuttal traffic.
So, like I said, thanks goes out to CNET's editors, who really need
to be fired, but thanks goes to them anyway. I especially love writing
any column that allows me to invoke speculative math.
And
in other news, the Dolphins completed the trade for David Boston,
and they gave up almost nothing in return. A sixth-round draft pick
(inconsequential) and an unidentified player rumored to be Jamar
Fletcher (one of the Dolphins' worst players, would have been fired
if he wasn't traded). So suddenly, what was shaping up to be another
offseason trail of tears suddenly looks a whole lot rosier.
Wide
receiver is done. Chambers will eventually be one of the top five
receivers in football, and if Boston keeps his head on straight,
the Dolphins will actually have one of the top starting receiver
tandem in football...and that's just amazing. And if Boston washes
up, there's still Derrius Thompson as an insurance policy (he sucked
in his first year but might be ready this year). The offensive line
is (I think) better than last year, simply due to the fact that it's
mostly different people than last year. The O-line was horrible last
year, and the Dolphins did what they needed to do: throw then all
out, and sign free agents to take their places. And although they
couldn't get most of the players they were hoping for, the ones they
did get are pretty good (if not great). Which is a lot more than
can be said about last year's O-line cast.
And
since receiver is already dealt with, the Dolphins can focus on
making the O-line better in the draft. They finally have a first-round
pick for the first time in years (thanks, Jimmy Johnson, for fouling
that up so badly), and it's pretty clear that they'll use it for
the line. They'd better. There's really nowhere else they're hurting.
They've lost backups at linebacker and fullback through free agency,
but they've kept all their starters (except Brock Marion), which
is the key. Backups can always be replaced with other teams' backups.
The only painful loss was Marion, although I'm not entirely sure
they won't end up re-signing him. He's declining, but Freeman just
isn't good enough to be the starter (as he proved in 2002 before
being demoted). Maybe they can draft a starting safety. But not before
they draft an offensive lineman. or two. or three.
Last
year proved that even having the best running back in football is
not enough when he's toiling behind an inadequate line. So even though
the line's already better through the additions so far, they need
to keep adding. Have I mentioned that enough times? ;)
Cornerback
is set: they somehow managed to keep Madison alongside Surtain, and
added some third guy who's supposed to be good. That should make
up for losing Buckley (although I hope they manage to keep him in
the end), and if Fletcher really is gone in the Boston trade, that's
something that every Dolphins fan will rejoice over.
With
two standout receivers on board, quarterback should be good enough.
If Feeley's ready then it's an upgrade (physical-capability-wise
at least), and if he's not, then Fiedler should suffice due to the
fact that he'll finally have two people to throw the ball to. They
stole Buffalo's special trams guy to make up for the loss of Hendricks,
although I'm not sure why they let Hendricks leave in the first place.
Arizona might have been offering him linebacker money, I didn't catch
thee dollar amount.
There's
the Ogunleye issue, which could get ugly, but the fact that they
didn't ship him out in the Boston trade might be a good sign. Two
years ago Trace Armstrong was in a similar position and they let
him leave, but Armstrong was an old man and he bombed with the Raiders
after he left. But Ogunleye is younger than me, and will only be
getting better the next few years, not worse, so the Dolphins need
to figure out some way to keep him.
Anyway,
if you're not a pro football person and you're still reading, I commend
you. Also, if you're not a pro football person, I can't imagine why
you're still reading. Alright, here's something for the rest of you.
I saw Starsky and Hutch, and it was unbelievably stupid, which is
exactly what I was looking for. Needed a laugh like that. I won't
ruin it for you (not that there's much to ruin), but the scene near
the end where they try to land their car on top of a yacht, the image
of the car sailing through the air only to...oh, I said I wouldn't
ruin it. See the movie in a packed theater, so when everyone else
is laughing, you won't feel guilty in doing so either. There are
some gags that will make you want to howl out loud.
OK
I think that's enough.
back
to billpalmer.net
2:29
am,
Sunday, 3/14: bad time of year for sports
As
I've said before, I'd rather stare at a blank screen than watch college
basketball. No offense toward that particular sport intended, but
it just doesn't do anything for me. Which stinks for me, considering
that right now, college basketball is the only thing that's on the
sports networks right now. Every time I turn on ESPN hoping to
find something interesting, there's yet another conference tournament
game on. Worse, SportsCenter is routinely being pre-empted from its
normal times, to accommodate the games, and even when SportsCenter
does broadcast, it's of course nearly entirely about the day's college
basketball games. Even sports variety shows like Around the Horn
and Pardon the Interruption can't seem to bring themselves to talk
about anything but college basketball. And ESPN 2, whose entire
supposed reason for existence is to provide an alternative to whatever's
being shown on the main network, is mostly just broadcasting the
second-most popular college basketball game while ESPN is broadcasting
the first.
And
the worst part is that the college basketball championship tournament,
which consists of sixty-three more games, doesn't even start until
next week.
I
guess the only consolation is that at least it will end eventually,
and perhaps we'll finally get to hear about something, anything,
else going on in the sports world. You might wonder just what I would
rather the sports networks be focusing on instead of giving 99.9%
of their attention to college basketball. Well, for one thing, pro
football is currently enthralled in the eternal soap opera of free-agent
signings. And while I don't consider pro football's off-season roster
moves to be bigger news than college basketball's championship
tournament, I do find it far more interesting. Heck, I'd find more
interest in hearing about the Miami Dolphins' annual team field
trip to the Everglades, than I would in hearing about college basketball.
But
that's just me.
I'm
not saying that the broadcast coverage should necessarily be done
any differently, I'm just saying I can't wait until it's over. Without
question, this is absolutely the worst time of year to be a sports
fan with my particular tastes. As with every year, all I can do is
wait it out. Another two weeks and baseball starts up, which is at
least moderately entertaining if uninspiring. I guess I should be
excited that my team is going into the season as the defending World
Series champs, but their odds of winning it again this year are about
as good as the odds of me winning it. They weren't nearly
good enough to win it last year, and did so only through an incredible
series of events. And this year they've cut payroll even further.
and as such will be attempting to defend their crown without several
of their best players (shades of 1997/98 anyone?).
But
at least it's not college basketball.
Anyway,
just killing time until the Dolphins announce whether or not they
have in fact acquired David Boston. Not that ESPN will waste any
time covering that, or any other pro football development. On that
note, thank God for the Internet. Go to a site like "sports.yahoo.com/nfl"
and it's all pro football, all the time, no matter how mundane the
news may be. I guess I shouldn't care that "Oakland signs LB Dwayne
Rudd" or that "Ty Law
says he doesn't want to play for Patriots", but I do nonetheless;
it's interesting if not newsworthy. It's certainly more interesting
to me than who wins the college basketball championship, which is
newsworthy but not interesting.
Oh well, only six
more months until the pro football season kicks off.
back
to billpalmer.net
11:23
pm, Friday, 3/12: perhaps you'd be happier with a different job
Alright,
so I didn't see that coming. In the past year I've gotten reader
feedback from some unexpected places, but Zack Zalon is one of the
last people I ever expected to hear from. Who is he? Oh, just the
President of Virgin Digital. I hadn't even heard of him until BusinessWeek
decided to declare that Virgin's yet-to-exist music download service
has already defeated market leader iTunes. Zack contacted me because
he was concerned about the fact that I said he was "bashing" iTunes,
says he has no ill will toward it, and -- surprise -- he's a Mac
user. I don't want to say any more just yet. Seeing as he's the one
who struck up the conversation, I've got some questions for him.
Seems like a nice enough guy, certainly not as arrogant as he sounded
in his public comments. Darn it, I was so going
to enjoy making fun of him, time and again. We'll
see what happens.
On
a totally unrelated note, I just caught an old episode of Star Trek:
The Next Generation (color me geek if you must), and there's a part
where Data is prisoner of the evil leader of the Romulan Empire,
who says "I very much enjoy writing, but I rarely get to do it in
this job." To which Data replies, in a tone of voice that makes you
think he was actually trying to offer useful advice, "Perhaps you'd
be happier with a different job." For my money, the best lines are
always the ones that are delivered deadpan.
Word
has
it that a woman was arrested for trying to pay for her stuff at WalMart with
a million dollar bill.
Why
didn't I think of that?
back
to billpalmer.net
6:12
am, Thursday, 3/11: ...and your podium is gone.
Well,
that sure sucked.
Is
it safe to come out now? I mean, is the evil "we've shut you down
without warning or provocation" monster gone yet? And here, just
when I had it in my head that I was going to resume daily blog entries,
my site is gone. Oops.
I'm
reminded of Don Cheadle's line in Ocean's Eleven, expressing the
disappointment in the accomplice who let him down and got them caught
as a result: "You had one job!". Well, a webhosting
company has one job, and that's to keep your site up and
running 24/7/365, no matter what. Not only did my webhost fail at
that job, they failed in purpose; simply shutting me off because
I was getting a whole lot more traffic over the past month than they
cared for. So how much warning did they give me? Well, none, of course.
After they pulled the trigger, they sent me an email that
basically said "Your site is gone, our puny hardware couldn't handle
all your traffic, so we shut you down, nanny nanny boo boo." Needless
to say,
they're no longer my webhost. Sure, I could have upgraded to a more
robust
hosting
package
with
them, but, you know...they had one job...
Well,
moving on, I think I've got everything back in one piece. I successfully
transferred the domain to the new host (which is a lot easier to
do than I had feared), and by now most people can once again access
the site (the domain transfer gets noticed by various internet service
providers over a three-day period, resulting in a cascading effect
of users regaining front-end access). iPod Garage and Mac Mischief
are mostly accessible through their own domains, as well. I've gotten
the email
forwarding
reestablished; the discussion boards once again have graphics and
logos; the online user group sign up form is working again. Hey,
it's a lot to recover from, there's a lot going on here. All because
someone had one job, and couldn't do it.
I
mean, the site was just gone, you know? I've come to expect the bizarre,
in the year that I've been doing this, but the site disappearing
because it's too popular? Reminds me of the episode of Saturday
Night Live
Celebrity Jeopardy, in which
Alex Trebek goes to check and see whether Nicholas Cage has written
down the correct answer for Final Jeopardy, only to find that something's
missing, and to respond, "...and your podium is gone." It's only
funny because it's preposterous. Of all the humorously incorrect
answers that you might have expected to see displayed on Nicholas
Cage's podium, you never saw it coming that his podium would disappear,
because
that
kind of thing just doesn't happen. Same thing with my site disappearing.
But
hey, it's all good. Readers have been fantastic so far about chipping
in to help pay for all the fancy new bandwidth that I've signed
up for with my new webhosting service, and hopefully that trend will
continue. Bandwidth is a catch-22, really. You always want more readers
and more traffic, but when you get 'em, it costs you. More traffic
means more bargaining power with potential advertisers, but the advertising
has to pay for the bandwidth, and so on. Well, if I have a choice
of more readers or a lower bandwidth bill, I'll take more readers
every time. I'll figure out how to creatively cover the cost, one
way or the other. I want all 25 million Mac users reading this site
on a daily basis, you know?
Alright, enough
already. Time to venture forward. The upside is that I've now got
so much server space I don't know what to do with myself; I've got
28 times what I had when the week started. I could store a house
in there! I guess some things were supposed to happen. A little less
shockingly would be nice.
I've got so much
to say about the Miami Dolphins, but I'll wait another day or so
to see how the David Boston trade rumors work out, before trying
to assess things. It would mean that the Dolphins would have two
top-tier wide receivers for
the
first time since...Duper and Clayton. It's been a dozen years or
more. Maybe this is the season after all. But then again, there's
the train
wreck
at Offensive Tackle. Oops, I said I was going to wait another day...
See you tomorrow,
unless my podium suddenly disappears again. They had one job!...
;)
back
to billpalmer.net
5:59
am, Sunday, 3/7: back again, and almost entirely content-free
Hey,
whaddaya know, a blog entry. Haven't seen one of those around here
in awhile, eh?
Oh,
I've got excuses plenty. I'm running three websites, two of which
have launched in the past six weeks. I had three dozen relatives
in town. I had to work on a huge iLife project. My dog ate my homework.
The sky is falling. Global warming.
Aw
heck, make up your own excuse. But
I've started up again, because one person in particular told me that
she was a regular reader. You know who you are. Anyway, there's so
much to write about, I'm not even sure where to start.
My
beloved Dolphins now have quarterbacks named Jay Fiedler and A.J.
Feeley. Insert your own joke about seeing them in the same place
at the same time before believing that they're not the same person.
Actually, bringing in Feeley made sense. It gives the Dolphins both
a solid if unspectacular veteran in Fiedler (who they know can start
right now), and a young and promising guy with much more potential
in Feeley (who they know can start eventually). Of course the big
question is which one of the two will end up starting this year,
and that all comes down to just how ready Feeley is. At age 26, Feeley's
a few months younger than I am. But enough about football.
There's
been so much coming and going of people around here lately that you
literally needed a schedule to know who was arriving or leaving on
what day. I think it all went about as well as a funeral could. It
sure was good to see everybody again. With a family this huge, it
seems like there's always somebody you haven't seen in ten years.
I think I mentioned that my fourteen first cousins have managed to
collectively bring twelve children into this world, with a thirteenth
one imminent. Well, make that fourteen, as word has come down that
yet another baby is on its way. Hey, the more the merrier.
Looking
back at my previous blog entries, the last time I wrote I had just
launched iPod Garage. Well, that seems like an eternity ago by now.
I can't remember not having iPod Garage. It's been an absolutely
huge first six weeks for the site. The iTunes Bottlecap Map, which
I originally posted as a joke, has brought all kinds of traffic from
oddball sources. I've managed to post new content to the site nearly
every day, which was a bit of a concern going on to it. Interviewing
musician Peter Griesar was an unexpected bonus. Getting attention
from the Wall Street Journal was just scary. And last night, I agreed
in principle to a fifth site sponsor, which makes running the site
a bit more, you know, practical. It's not about the money, but on
the other hand, I do enjoy eating a meal now and then.
And
then there's MacMischief.com, which I launched without much fanfare,
because as of now it's just a straight-ahead news digest site, perhaps
still searching for an identity. But there are things at work with
that site that I can't really share yet; rest assured that it's going somewhere.
Just can't say where. Keep your eyes open.
Finally made it
to Disney Animal Kingdom this week. Don't really know what I was
expecting. Don't really know what I thought of it, either. Only spent
a couple of hours there, before the people I was with decided that
we were bolting for Magic Kingdom. I didn't really care where we
were going; I can always go back later. Funny thing about Magic Kingdom:
Mission to Mars is closed for renovation. 20,000 Leagues Under the
Sea is closed permanently. Sky Buckets are gone. SmallWorld is about
to close for 18 months for renovations. Keep up this pace, is anything
going to be open? Whatever. This is apparently the best time of year
to go by far, as we were able to get on every ride with almost no
wait. Being a Wednesday doesn't hurt, either. That's a hint to all
you tourists out there.
Well I'd write
more, but I've already written too much. Now that I'm back, we'll
see if I can't keep this going regularly. Plenty to write about.
Check back tomorrow. We'll see. ;)
back
to billpalmer.net
6:25
am, Tuesday, 2/3: Bernie's come home
Once
upon a time, Bernie Parmalee was a UPS truck driver. Then he became
a running back for the Dolphins. He wasn't quite good enough and
he only lasted a year or two, but I always rooted for him because
of what he had to go through to get as far as he did. Now that his
playing days are over, the Dolphins have hired him as running backs
coach.
Do
I detect a running theme here? First Dan Marino, now Bernie. For
that matter, last week the Dolphins added two former offensive coordinators
as assistants to the new offensive coordinator, who has never been
an offensive coordinator before. Throw in Spielman, and there are
now so many people involved in the offense that they might be in
violation of a fire code. They might have to hold a primary and a
caucus to determine which play to call. Seriously, either the Dolphins
have loaded up on so much offensive brainpower that they'll be able
to overcome Wannstedt's continual offensive blind spot...or they've
hired way too many cooks here. Too bad none of these newcomers can
still put on a uniform.
But
then again, rumors abound that the Dolphins will go after Jacksonville
quarterback Mark Brunell. Jacksonville doesn't want him anymore,
so naturally that means that the Dolphins do. Actually, rumor has
it that Brunell may end up in Tampa, in which case the Dolphins are
rumored to go after Tampa's Brad Johnson. In other words, whichever
castoff isn't wanted, we'll take him. Kurt Warner is probably available
as well. This is where you have to be glad that Marino is involved.
Who better to
determine
which
of
these
veteran quarterbacks can still play?
SuperBowl
was fun. Haven't watched it with that many people in the room in
a long time. The good news is, now that the season is officially
over, the slate is clean and the Dolphins are once again officially
undefeated. Then again, so is every other team in the league...
But
we're the only ones with a running backs coach named Bernie.
back
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